Breathing Room

Remember those tile puzzles that we used to play with as kids that had tiles that you moved around to form a picture. We used to get them in cereal boxes or little cheap toy giveaways. You would slide one piece over, then another piece up, then another over, and around and around you went until you got some pieces to form a picture. In those puzzles there is always one empty space. One space that you could move a tile in to in order to move another tile over. Imagine if the puzzle had no extra space to move to. If all the spaces were taken up, it would be impossible to move, and more important, it would be impossible to win.

But this is where we find most professionals, most people that hustle hard. The people that tell you to wake up early and get the most out of your day. The people that don’t sit down, but are working hard all the time, with little sleep like it’s a badge of honor for working so hard. I admit, I was there too. I called people lazy because they didn’t have the same energy as me, I thought their ambition was little because they didn’t dream like I dreamt. I thought there was something wrong with them because they weren’t like me. Oh how naive and self-centered we are when we are young.

When you run at maximum speed all the time, the only way to go is down. When you are working hard and there aren’t enough hours in the day, there is nothing you could do to get more time, no matter how hard you work. These people who are running at top speed are heading for burn out. They have so much on their plate, the responsibilities of all the hats they wear at home and at work are too much for them to put one down. They are spinning too many plates and if they let one go the rest will fall. Well that’s the mindset they have.

The myth they believe is that if it doesn’t contribute to your goals, you need to cut it out. Watching Netflix, hanging out with friends, going on trips, trying something different, … anything that isn’t pushing you toward your goals, is then against your goals. The opportunity cost of doing something else, is pushing you further from your goals. If you’re not with me, you’re against me!

Although the logic is there; “if I go this way, I can’t go that way at the same time”, it makes sense, but for those that understand breathing room it’s not a matter or constantly leaning toward your goal, it’s a matter of impact and efficiency. Instead of working harder, it’s your first step in working smarter.

## How to create some breathing room
At some point your body is going to give up and running at maximum speed is going to take its toll. When high performers get sick they say things like, “my body is telling me to slow down”. And usually when they get the rest they needed they are back at running at top speed. What we need to do is create some space in our routine to avoid running at 100% constantly and look to only run at 90%. In your eight hour day, leave one hour with no responsibilities tied to it. In your week, leave one day allowed for anything that could come up. In your finances, keep 10% to the side for a rainy-day or just some cushion for something. If your house is a mess, keep at least one space clean (a desk, a drawer, a closet,…) something that is organized that you could count on. The main thing is creating that space. Just like the puzzle game, that you could move something into when needed.

The space you create might seem counterintuitive, but it’s for your overall maximum performance, not consistent speed. Creating this room allows for extra effort when needed. Something out of the blue comes up and now you’re not frazzled because you have created that space to handle that unexpected issue. It’s expecting the unexpected. It’s what people would say when you’re able to see 10 moves ahead. No, it’s just you left room in my life to deal with those things as they come at you. It’s being prepared for the setbacks so when they arrive you know what to do.

When you have the space in your life to run at 90% and then 100% when you need to, it allows for heroic effort at times, but then gets back down to a manageable speed, where all plates are still spinning.

The phrase “when it rains, it pours” means that once something goes bad it has a domino effect for other things to go bad. So a couple of things to note here: 1) After something bad happens we are on heightened alert and looking for anything else that’s bad and anything that comes up, no matter how small the issue, it triggers the phrase and feeling. 2) When your attention is constantly needed to keep all the plates spinning what did you expect to happen when you spend more than your allotted attention on one plate? The other plates suffer and thus you get more and more problems. It’s unreasonable to think that you could maintain that level of performance forever. Over extending yourself works in the short run, but not in the long run.

The breathing room you create allows you time to deal with one problem at a time. This allows the other problems to get the appropriate attention they need, so they get downgraded from pouring rain, to just a drizzle. It makes you seem calm during a crisis because you have the freedom to move, you aren’t tied down by things and it allows you to work smarter: planning out your next moves while things are parked.

I used to exert so much energy, staying late hours and feeling that I was the only one that could do all of this. It wasn’t until I decided that I need to keep some room off to the side, that I felt the potential of breathing room. I’m less stressed so I’m able to tackle issues and my goals will a fresh mind and renewed energy. That my tasks are clear and I’m able to focus on whatever is in front of me because I’ve created the space to deal with the other things. I’m both effective and efficient with my time and energy.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like I’m sitting around with nothing to do. I have a never ending to-do list and projects that will keep me busy for several lifetimes. It’s easy to have space when there is nothing to do, but creating space where there is none, this IS the work.

So how do we create space in our busy lives.
1) Set clear expectations — we spend so much wasted time in the category of “this isn’t what I expected”. Either you own or someone you’re responsible to. Setting clear expectations will save time with rework and stressful interactions.
2) Be comfortable Reprioritizing — the only constant is change. In a world that is constantly moving, knowing how to shift gears on the fly is not a nice to have but a need to have. If have to be able to know that a priority for someone else doesn’t necessarily mean a priority for you. Which leads to the last item
3) Learn to say No — things are constantly going to be pulling for your attention and the higher up the success ladder you go, the more things are going to be pulling. Learning to say no is a key ingredient to getting the most of what’s on your plates. If you say No to the new thing, you are saying yes to what you’ve already committed to.

If you haven’t incorporated breathing room into your routine, I highly recommend it and if you do for the first time, let me know what you plan on doing. If you have already used this tactic before to get a handle on your schedule, let me know how you did it in the comments, I don’t know everything so tips and hacks are always welcome.

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